Reckless Abandonment
When I was in Middle School, I read a book called Lady in Waiting. It was a devotional for girls to teach them how to become mighty women of God. It has been about 10 years since I have read that book, but its impact is still making waves in my life today. The first chapter is titled “A Lady of Reckless Abandonment”. It focuses on the beautiful story of the woman who anointed Jesus’ feet with an expensive jar of perfume. This is one of my favorite stories because it demonstrates the power of abandonment. The jar of perfume was far more than just expensive liquid. Traditionally, the Hebrews would use this jar to collect all of their tears and then mix it with perfume. It was this beautiful idea that God was collecting all of their grief and turning it into an exquisite fragrance. So when the woman knelt down and broke her alabaster jar before Jesus, she was not just pouring out expensive liquid – she was literally taking every tear her heart had ever cried and placing it at the Lord’s feet. Scripture says that she did not just pour the perfume on Christ’s feet – no she did something far more beautiful. She completely broke the jar. She decided that she would no longer collect tears, and would simply abandon everything and follow Jesus. In this moment, I can just feel her brokenness. I can just feel her heart saying “Take all of me Jesus, take my past, take my hurts, take my grief, take my passions, I break it all at your feet.” She did this because she recognized Jesus as God. Once she realized that the God of the universe was before her, it was everything she could do to contain herself. She ran to find the most precious thing that she owned, the thing that she treasured closest to her heart, and then broke it at Jesus’ feet in a sign of submission. She was a woman of Reckless Abandonment. Because of this act of brokenness, Jesus says that her story would be told throughout the entire world for thousands of generations.
I love that phrase – Reckless Abandonment. I can just feel the freedom saturating those words. In order to abandon things, truly abandon them, there is a wild passion behind it. It is the type of passion that drives crazy people to do the impossible. It is the type of passion that makes people believe that dreams are possible, and that Kingdom can truly come. I have been learning this month, that to truly go to the deeper places of God, we must because people of Reckless Abandonment. There are so many things in this world that are holding us back from the dynamic things of God. How tightly do I hold on to things, and am I willing to break everything at Jesus’ feet in order to follow him. As much as I don’t want to admit it, abandonment is the message of the Gospels. Every person that Jesus called to follow him had to completely abandon their old life. They didn’t just have to leave their past mistakes behind, they were even called to abandon the good, God-given things. This is the place that God has been calling me to this month. A few days ago, I felt God calling me to abandon even more than I already have. At first I was resistant. I kept praying, “God I’ve given up my family, my home, my bed, what else do you want me to give up?” And yet he called me deeper. I began breaking the things that he was asking me at his feet in a sign of submission and abandonment. Even though it is hard to break the things that you love, it is also the most freeing thing in the world.
Today I was brought to another level of abandonment. Our squad leaders have been praying for a while what the next step for our squad was. They felt like the Lord was calling us all to a level of abandonment. They heard the Lord asking us to fast all technology as we spend December in Israel. This means that we will not have any Internet access, and will not use our computers, iPods, or anything else electronic. So this month, I will not be able to communicate with all of you who I love so much. But please know that you are in my prayers constantly and that I miss you more than I can describe over the internet. Even though I am very sad that I will not be able to talk to my family on Christmas, I am excited that God loves us enough to challenge us. I am really looking forward to spending more time with Him and just sitting at the Lord’s feet in worship. We are leaving for Israel in less than 8 hours and I could not be more excited!! It is the perfect place for me to get still before the Lord, and show Jesus’ love to those who have not experienced it yet. That’s the thing about abandonment, God doesn’t just call us to hard places so that we can suffer – it’s because he has so much more good for us! He wants to shower us with his love, his blessings and his anointing. Sometimes those things can only come when we are at a place of complete brokenness. And the quickest was to brokenness is through abandonment, reckless abandonment. Is God calling you to lay some things down at his feet? Are you ready to respond in reckless abandonment and completely break the jar instead? You see, I just keep getting this whisper in my ear that abandonment is the key to blessing. It’s the key to a deeper relationship with Jesus. It the start of a different kind of life – a world changing kind of life.
So may we have the strength to take our most precious alabaster jar and use it to anoint the precious Lamb of God.
May we have the courage to hear the Lord’s voice as he calls us to deeper places with him. And may we have the obedience to walk down that path.
May we truly be people of reckless abandonment.
I love you my precious daughter. I know that the Lord will meet with you and show you new facets of his being as you spend time alone with his word, his spirit, his presence…and nothing else. I am so very proud of you and can’t wait to hear from you in January. Love my girl….
Oh my sweet Jen
I am so proud of you! I love you with all my heart. My communication with you has been little because of finishing up my degree. I do want you to knw that you have not been far from my thoughts! I thank God for you and the love you show for him. You have turned into such an inspiration to me and to ohers, I know you will feel God’s presence and love like you never have before during the month of Dec. Just lay at his feet and let him shower you with all he love and blessing. I am so excited that I can’t wait to hear what God has done for you in Jan!
I love you my sweet Jen
Aunt Janice
Go abandon yourself to Him.
can’t what to see all that He does.
I love you.
This was so very encouraging. Thank you. Everyone in our family is reading your blog.
We love you.
[…] The World Race program talks about the different steps many racers go through to get to the point of Kingdom Empowerment. They say the steps are abandonment, brokenness, dependence, and finally empowerment. I feel like I reached abandonment in Turkey. […]
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